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Red Flags, Green Flags and Healthy Relationships

Monday, February 13, 2023

How do we measure health in a relationship?

Great question. 

So how do you know if the romantic relationship in your life is positively contributing to your health or bringing you down? Use this information to evaluate your relationship this season of love.  

Relationship Green Flags 

  • Offers emotional support 
  • Openly communicates  
  • Values honesty  
  • Respects your boundaries  
  • Makes decisions with you 
  • You feel like you can be yourself around them 
  • Actively listens to you 
GIF of women waving green flag

Relationship Red Flags:  

  • Limits/controls your time with family and friends 
  • Frequently dishonest 
  • Pushes your boundaries 
  • Dismissive of your feelings
  • Cheats
  • Withholds affection
  • Short-tempered tendencies 
GIF of women saying thats a red flag


Relationships are complicated 

There may be some good and some bad qualities present. Identifying where those qualities fall on a relationship spectrum can help you determine the overall health of your love connection.  
 The relationship spectrum

Source: The Relationship Spectrum.  


Ways to improve the quality of your relationship: 

  •  Ask before you share
  • Our partners are humans too! They have their own struggles, stress, and burdens. Before dumping on your partner about your frustrating professor and rude coworkers, ask them if they have space to listen. This will allow your partner to share whether they have the capacity to fully support you at that time!
  • Listen first
  • Before sharing your difficulties with your partner, ask them if there is anything they want to or need to share with you. Then actively listen as they share!
  • Clearly communicate your needs!
  • Instead of waiting until your partner figures out what is making you feel down, tell them! Sharing your feelings with your partner instead of hoping they’ll figure it out on their own helps foster honesty and healthy communication in your relationship! 
GIF of dwight from the office

So, whether you’re happily in love this Valentine’s season, reevaluating your romantic commitment or considering a future relationship, keep these tips in mind!  

If you evaluate your relationship and find it leaning toward the unhealthy and abusive end of the spectrum, you are not stuck. Check out the resources below for information and support. 

Healthy relationships take work, but don’t be discouraged. You and your sweetheart can keep the romance flowing by keeping respect, communication and honesty at the center. 

We hope you have a happy (and healthy) Valentine’s Day, Cowboys! 

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